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  • Writer's picturelegomastro1234

Diary of a Veggie Sausage ep.1

Updated: May 13, 2020

A comedy diary



Hello, just to make things clear I am a veggie sausage not a pork sausage, so don’t go on thinking that I am made for meat eaters! We are at war there are mashed potato bomb shelters and ketchup guns lying everywhere, rock cake pillboxes bought from cake land and baked bean armour shattered everywhere. We are rationed to 1 piece of chive and one bottle of veggie stock powder soaked in ketchup each day, the whole town is in chaos! My name is Mart.


Today a pork sausage came into our town!! The weird thing was, he had his ends up*“Wait don’t shoot.” he said,” I got thrown out of the army last year and need to find somewhere to live” After a long discussion our villagers were OK with it ,but they said he would be guarded and had to live next to my house!!! “OK.” he said. Great. Now I will be living next to a pork sausage for the rest of my life.


Today is the worst day of my life! The pork sausage came into my house and asked for 20 baked bean bucks! I didn’t want to make him angry at me so I handed it over but I felt completely angry inside oh when will this guy move away.

*hands up

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zero g earth

Hi I am James and I am writing this in my new floating diary I got for my birthday It is so cool I was amazed when I got it but my brother ripped it and now I'm so angry with him I could kill him. wh


May 20, 2020

haha what a great story


May 08, 2020

Great illustration - 20 baked bean bucks is quite a demand! Whatever will the veggie sausage do if this goes on? Looking forward to finding out! xx


May 05, 2020

Love this, Leo! What an original idea. Have you thought about illustrating it? Love the idea of a pork sausage versus a veggie sausage and looking forward to hearing what happens next. Well done! :)

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